Deleting Instagram to maintain a sense of human existence
What does it mean to lose our sense of being human?
What does it mean for the world to thrive? Do we mean economically? Equally? Peacefully? It all seems a little vague…and how do we decide if it’s right for everyone?
What would any of that matter if it doesn’t include independence, self-satisfaction and love, purpose, meaning, worthy relationships, and self-fulfillment?
I think we’re way the fuck off track. Especially after constantly reading so much content and listening to so much media that has nothing to do with our growth and healthy progress.
I can’t get over this feeling that somehow we’re on track for pulling ourselves away from what it really means to be human.
I don’t mean that on just an individual level…not this time. I mean that in the sense of it affecting complete human existence…because the relationship of each individual to him/herself affects the relationship to the rest of us. I mean, if we pull ourselves too far away from the internal and external needs built by our evolution, then we may forget what it takes to do that. Then what are we?
I love learning new information. I wouldn’t be who I am without the books, the videos, the documentaries. I’ve found not only myself, but much needed father figures through my learnings. Our technology and science is fucking life changing. What we know about the brain and body, what we’ve learned about human behavior and trauma. There’s so much that is definitely making the positive potential of our lives possible. But…it may destroy us.
About a month ago I made the choice to delete Instagram. Not entirely, but every week. Giving myself access all day Sunday without bounds. I can post whatever things I need to from the week, catch up on my group chats, scroll through some stories and reels…really I just want to laugh a little bit.
But even with just one day of access, I find myself unable to pull away. Scrolling, rechecking, scrolling, opening when I have any extra moments…gross dude.
The thing was, before I gave up Instagram I was constantly tired. My creativity was nonexistent, and I couldn’t connect with anything. Instead of some out-of-body experience, I was having an in-body experience. But, not a good one. It felt as if I was watching my life happen from behind a transparent wall of plexiglass that was 3 feet thick. I could watch myself do everything, but everything was numb. I had no emotional connection to anything that I was doing. Nothing felt right or wrong…so how could I make choices at all?
It’s only been a month and a half, and it’s still exhaustingly slow coming back to “me”. I can write, but it comes out logistical at best. I can record podcasts, but they’re not fluid or inspirational. Its fucking horrifying thinking you’ve lost your edge.
A couple years ago, I got this theory that I’ve wrote and ranted about a few times. This idea that there is(or will be) a necessity to blend our evolutionary internal needs with our external validating(possibly addictive) progress. Something I don’t think we’ve mastered yet given much thought to yet either.
Think about it:
- We’re mentally and physically exhausted most of the time
- Life feels less and less fulfilling even when we may have our success and/or status we’ve always been after
- Dating and relationships seem to never be right or enough
- Our ability to be present without feeling shame about our past or fearful of our future is a near impossibility
- Rather than naturally, everything has become a practice in order to keep ourselves physically and mentally healthy; our food choices, exercising in gyms, meditation, self-love, adventure, dating, self-healing, self-satisfaction
- Instead of prioritizing our time to live our lives, we prioritize our work. We’re always worried about our success, our influence, and validating our impact and worth in a modern world…rather than proving to ourselves that we love who we are and making our soul happy.
- We’re all hiring therapists, counselors, and coaches to keep us focused, and help us attain “all of the things”. FYI, I love all of these people for what they do and their ability to provide for people in need.
What we need is:
- Healthy, loving social connections
- Sense of identity
- Emotional regulation and understanding
- Self-acceptance, self-love, self-respect
- Mission, purpose, meaning
- Healthy diets and healthy bodies
- Empathetic connections to each other and the world’s ecosystems
Deleting Instagram wasn’t a complete reset or an answer for all of my problems…but thinking that social media is the only way that I can create a thriving business or keep in contact with people I love is a little insane.
I feel like we have a long way to go when it comes to moving the world forward, and at the same time not suffocating our natural needs of physical, mental and emotional balance. I don’t think it’s impossible, I just think together, we haven’t yet seen the harmful affects of having one without the other.
I think progress does and always will mean taking care of our human needs first. Not just for our health, but for individual and societal(even global?) progress.
Whatever path we’re on, we still don’t have it quite right. Not yet.
I’m still questioning…are you?
“I’m not a smart man, but I know what love is” -Forrest Gump
If you like what I’m doing here, you can check out the rest of my blog or check out my podcast “The Rebel Minded Podcast” on Spotify. Or you can listen to my latest episode at therebelminded.com. I question everything that makes me curious and skeptical, and am looking for others to create a dialogue and community with.
Thanks for reading! I mean…thanks for reading?